Complain As Much As You Want…

Complain As Much As You Want…

“Be stronger than your strongest excuse.”

Excuses, drama, lack of respect, crossing boundaries, responsibility, and honesty are just a few of the core areas we lack in sports due to many situations and differences in personalities, beliefs, and values. We have parents and players who complain, whine, yell, create drama, and have a demeaning language against coaches and other players when their child isn’t perceived as the “star” like they see. I am not saying all coaches are out in the clear, but I and the coaches I work with and that are a part of our organization do not allow favoring, and we do not crumble under the negative and demeaning behavior and words from parent and player complaints. We stand our ground on what we believe is valuable within the team which is respect, diligence, commitment, and communication. These focal points come with a lot of details and other factors, and I whole heartedly believe that parents and players on our teams who do not respect these points, are not going to reach the next level successfully, and they will deal with the same problems on any team they are on.

As coaches, we will have faults. We will have errors in judgement. We will follow our gut. We will speak our mind. We will make great calls. We will make a plan and see it through. We will make a plan and have to change it when something goes awry. We will make judgements. We will base decisions on attitudes, diligence, and experience. We will base decisions on practice, performance, and commitment. We will laugh, yell, smile, roll our eyes, get angry, get happy, feel disappointed, become frustrated, and become excited. We are human, just like you. We are not perfect, just like you. We are not always right, just like you. We are not always wrong, just like you. But what we do have is a heart for the game. A love for teaching and helping your athletes improve. A passion for guiding your athletes to the next level of play. A diligent attitude to do our BEST in enhancing your athlete’s skill sets. A committed and positive demeanor in getting your athletes to the next level, helping them create new goals, and helping them reach their highest potential along the way. We do not speak words of doubt or negativity, but words that come from the heart that are surrounded by respect and honesty.

Boundaries:

“Boundaries are your responsibility. You decide what is and isn’t allowed.”

Boundaries are defied all the time, but if we want to come to a positive conclusion, we need to communicate at the right time. At the Gold level, parents cannot walk into the dugout, talk to their kids, and yell and complain to the coaches. Your athlete is old enough to communicate with their coaches. Due to being at the Gold age, we start inflicting rules that will also be followed and instructed at the college level, so if your athlete needs food, water, Gatorade, or anything you think they need, give it to a coach, and we will give it to them. If you have complaints, your athlete is to speak to the coaches about their issues, opinions, and beliefs. But as we know, this will not always be followed, so if you need to complain or address issues, it is a 24 hour cool down rule. Ignoring this rule is not revealing a respectable demeanor to the athletes, other parents, or team. It is causing tension, negative energy, and blurring the team’s focus, values, expectations, and rules.

There will be words, opinions, and plans that we say and do that you may not like or want to hear, but if it is something you don’t agree with, ask us at the right time, not before, during, or after a game, but at the appropriate time, instead of letting emotions dictate words and cause a negative outcome. Yelling and bashing the coaches and other players is not respectful, it is not helping your situation, and it is not getting your point across. It is wrong and it is unprofessional. It is showing your athletes a behavior that is unacceptable, disrespectful, and hindering.

Diligence:

“Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice, and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do.”

No matter who you are, you are given what you work for and earn. There will be athletes that are more agile, stronger, faster, have better mechanics, a better attitude, and possess the willingness to play anywhere and learn a new position to get onto the field. So earning a spot will not be easy. Just because an athlete works hard doesn’t mean their opponent isn’t. Many factors play into the coaches decision on the best team and lineup they put into every single game, but complaining and whining about playing time is not going to get you to the next level. Diligence, dedication, determination, communication, and being a great teammate will. If you are willing to work diligently and earn your spot, you will be learning the importance of dedication to the sport. If you are willing to be a great team player and work hard for your TEAM, willing to play a different position, willing to learn a new position, then you will be learning the importance of TEAM, and diminishing selfishness. If you communicate with your coaches and ask questions, you will be learning the importance of accountability while growing in maturity. You have to understand that a coach, especially a college coach wants an ATHLETE; A versatile, agile, determined, positive, communicative, diligent athlete who is willing to put the work in, understand with an honest heart and eyes why they are not starting, and to say “YES coach, I will learn third base for the team”, or “YES coach, I will work harder”, or “YES coach, I understand the plan for the game.” If you want to be the starting pitcher, catcher, third baseman, center fielder, or whichever position you want, you EARN it. You train, you practice, and you work for it.

Attitude:

“There are three things you are always in total control over: Your attitude, your choices, and your effort.”

If you want to be an athlete at the next level, crying will not get you there. You have to be tough, determined, and have a mindset that will not say WHY ME, but TRY ME! If you fail, make a mistake, get injured, hit by a ball, or have a bad game, being dramatic, overbearing, complaining, whining to your parents, and being negative about the situation is not helping you, it is hurting you and your team. It is showing coaches and teammates that you are not willing to work yourself out of the problem, pick yourself up and dust off, be a supportive teammate, and become resilient; you are not a team player who is ready for the next level. You are a softball player who is selfish and lazy. An athlete who wants to improve, earn a spot, and reach their highest potential do not let obstacles stand in their way, and they do not let the behavior, attitudes, or words affect their own attitude, performance, and work ethic. An athlete who has a positive attitude, takes on the challenges, and works constantly to get better, will reach their highest potential.

Honest Eyes, Ears, and Words:

“The truth isn’t always comforting, but it is real.”

Understanding where your athlete’s skill level is compared to their teammates and competition is sometimes very disappointing and hard to look at. Rose colored glasses, sugar coating, and lying is formed and used on your athlete isn’t going to make them better. Telling your kid she is the best is not hyping them up but hurting them; she has to fight and work to be the best she can be, not just complain when she isn’t getting the playing time she wants, but doesn’t deserve. As coaches within our organization, we value honesty. We will tell you the truth, answer your questions, and give you feedback that is honest. It may not always be what you want to hear, but it will most likely be what you need to hear. The truth hurts sometimes, and can be heart breaking, but the truth is not being said to be hurtful, it is said to be helpful.

Responsibility:

“Being responsible means you do the things you are expected to do, and accept the consequences of your actions.”

It is your responsibility to go to every single practice. It is your responsibility to work 110% at practice and in games. It is your responsibility to understand that if you have an injury and if you miss practice, then you are not going to be given a starting spot right away once you are better. It is your responsibility to understand that just practicing with the team is not going to get you a starting position. It takes an athlete practicing on their own time, an athlete going to private lessons, and it takes fitness training, proper nutrition, and mental preparation. If you want a starting position and you want to get to the next level, it takes a lot more than a couple practices a week. College and professional athletes did not sit around and complain to get what they wanted. They practiced every single day, they trained on their own, they created a healthy and wholesome diet, they prepared their mindset for struggles, obstacles, losing, and winning, and they never gave up or expected anything to be given to them. They took control of their future by working in the present and never stopping whether it got hard or easy. Take responsibility for your actions, your behavior, your demeanor, your work ethic, your health, and your mindset.

Written by Nikoli Sharp